Have you ever just allowed any thoughts into your head and let them take over? Yes, I have also for most of my life. That to me is the same as allowing music to play, even if you don't like it. Just like you could turn the music off, you can learn to leave your negative thoughts turn off also.
Guards at an airport screen to make sure bad people or things don't get through. The same thing can go on in your mind. Hundreds of thoughts come into our head each day, many are negative or even scary. Once we catch them, we need to stop them and focus on a more positive thought. Below are some examples of going from negative thoughts to more positive thoughts.
1. I hate what he did to me and I would like to kick his butt into I wish he would be nicer to me but if he doesn't I will still be nice to him.
2. I absolutely need to get this job or I am finished. into I am going to try my hardest to get this job, but if I don't get it, I'll keep trying.
3. I can't stand the way kids play with their phones all of the time into The new generation have different ways of communicating and it is alright.
4. This trip to Wisconsin is way worse than Las Vegas last year into I am going to enjoy this trip for what it is, even if it is just for relaxing and no work.
Choosing good thoughts takes time and effort and it might not always be easy. The effort is worth it though. The more we practice it, the more it becomes entrenched and normal.
We can change our thoughts, but changes beleifs helps also. If you want to read more about this, Albert Ellis's REBT is a good topic to read about. By changing your thoughts and beleifs, you change the world-see my previous blog post.
Good luck on your journey in being the watchperson at your mind's gate. Hope your world changed from the inside out.